It’s one thing to have a lazy partner, but something completely different when said partner is also hateful, abusive, spiteful, manipulative, and entirely neglectful. Unfortunately, this 23-year-old mother is experiencing the wrath of her same-aged husband who possesses every single one of those repulsive, shameful qualities.

Taking to Reddit’s “Am I The A—hole” forum, the woman begins by explaining that she paused the internet on every device in their home because her husband refused to give their 8-month-old son a bath on time, per the nighttime routine she established for the baby. She wants to know if that makes her an a—hole, but the situation is way more complex than the internet/gaming debacle. She writes, “I know this sounds like YTA but let me explain, there’s a lot of background information that went into this decision.”

“My husband does not help with the household whatsoever. Doesn’t wash dishes, do laundry, clean any room of the house, cook dinner, etc. He’ll get home and throw off his uniform onto the floor and leave it there until the next day. If the house is dirty, he’ll chide me and tell me that I don’t do anything, I don’t clean enough, I don’t cook dinner enough, etc.” Hypocrite is probably the nicest word we have for this soggy diaper of a man.

She continues, “Our biggest issue is the baby. I am the main caretaker for our son 99.9% of the time. I get up with him during the night when he wakes up crying. My husband will here or there, but he’ll start screaming at me about how he needs his rest and I need to get up. If our son is sick, I’m the one that takes off work. I’ve missed almost 6 weeks of work in the past 3 months because my husband wouldn’t even ask his supervisor if he could stay home one of those days.”

“I’m the one that gets up at 6 am and stays up with our son until about 12 pm-1 pm and that’s when I tell my husband he needs to get up and take care of the baby so I can take a nap (he sleeps anywhere from 8-14 hrs a day while I take a nap between 1-4 hrs). Once I get up, he complains that I’ve been sleeping ‘all day’ while he’s been taking care of the baby by himself and I’m lazy.”

We’re honestly reeling at the sheer audacity this guy has. He should be grateful for the overwhelming load his wife takes on, concerned about her lack of sleep, and more than willing to share duties. Instead, he does nothing and screams at her for doing her best given the nonexistent support she has.

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