It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been doing it or how many kids you have or how much you love your job — being a working parent is hard, full stop. It’s hard when they start a new daycare or school, it’s hard when they get sick, and it’s hard when you have to travel for work and miss whole chunks of time with your kids. Katherine Heigl recently opened up about the latter in a new interview, and it’s a heartbreaking reality that many working moms and dads share.

The Firefly Lane actress is mom to Nancy Leigh “Naleigh” Mi-Eun Kelley, 14, Adalaide Marie Hope Kelley, 10, and Joshua Bishop Kelley, Jr., 5, with husband Josh Kelley. On the Nov. 28 episode of The View, Heigl opened up about the days after adopting Naleigh from South Korea.

“Naleigh came to us at 9 months, and three days later, I got on a plane and went to work in Atlanta. At the time, becoming a new mother, I was just like, ‘I got it, I got it. I can handle this,’” Heigl recalls. “They’ve told us, ‘We can have it all.’ We can have careers and have families. And it’s all going to be great, it’s all going to work out.’”

“I never saw that baby,” she admits, while getting emotional. And who can blame her? That would be so hard.

“I was at work with three triplets who were playing my goddaughter, and I spent more time with them than I did with my new daughter, and she bonded with my husband, of course. He was with her,” the Grey’s Anatomy alum continues. “So, I was always afraid that I had missed that opportunity to really bond with her, and that she didn’t love me.”

Being a working parent means your heart is torn in two between your kids and your career, and it’s something so many people struggle with, especially moms. We’ve all been there, feeling like we are missing out on our kids’ lives. Luckily, kids are resilient, and her mom’s time away doesn’t seem to have affected Naleigh as she smiles at her mom from the audience.

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